Duration: Approx. 40-60 minutes
Introduction
When we talk about discrimination, we can’t help but talk about personal actions and statements. A lot can happen between people, whether it’s their first-time meeting or they’ve been friends for 20 years. With this exercise we want to raise awareness about unintentional discrimination and its potential consequences, and we want to provide suggestions that should make it possible to avoid (unintended) discrimination. Why are we talking about intention? Because discrimination also works without bad intent. Discrimination can occur even when there is no intention to discriminate and that it is crucial to be mindful of the impact of our words and actions on others. In this exercise we give an example scenario in which two persons are interacting. Based on one spoken sentence, you should first think about the motivation of the person speaking and then write down the potential thoughts of the person to whom the sentence is addressed. We will already share some perspectives and want to encourage you to write more. There are no wrong thoughts. Content note for BIPoC: In the exemplary scenario, we refer to a situation in everyday life that you may have experienced in a similar way (-> microaggression). Please be mindful of your own well-being and do the exercise in a way that is useful to you or skip it.
hdps://youtu.be/mVPGUOOPBwM SEXISM RACISM
“You can’t do that because you’re a woman.”
“Let a man do it!”
“Girls are better at languages anyway.”
Even in a society that believes itself to be freed from sexism, women and girls are reminded daily of where, according to sexist ideas, their place actually is – far away from heavy physical activity (be it football or a job in construction) and things that require scientific or technical skills. Moreover, they have no place in leadership positions. This is often justified by the “natural” characteristics of boys/men and girls/women. From an early age, we learn about the different roles of boys and girls in society. So there are ideas about gender roles that are very deeply rooted in us. Those who speak out in favour of equality between women and men should pay attention, both linguistically and in concrete actions, to creating equal opportunities that are not tied to supposed gender roles. This includes, for example, helping children to engage in activities (e.g. girls who like to work in construction and boys who like to play hairdressing salons) that do not necessarily coincide with traditional gender roles.
Interests are independent of gender. Of course, children are also more likely to like things for which they receive praise. So if a boy is told from an early age that playing dolls is only for girls, he will be more likely to look for a hobby that involves fewer conflicts and in which he is encouraged. And if all the girls in kindergarten wear pink, their daughter will soon want to have a pink tutu too. But this has less to do with the “nature” of the girls than with a sense of belonging and recognition.
“Where are you really from?”
Many people whose family has not been white and/or German for five generations have the experience of being perceived as less German and thus less of a sense of belonging. If the appearance or the name indicates that there are family members who are also people of color or black people, the burden of proof is sufficient to completely deny people a German origin. If, for example, the question “Where do you come from?” is answered with “Kassel” (a town in southern Germany), this is usually followed by the question: “Where do you really come from?” or “And where do your parents come from?” And if they also come from Germany, further research is carried out in the family history in order to explain the nonwhite German appearance or the name. Apart from the fact that it is a bit intimate to inquire about the migration routes of a family of a person you don’t know over four generations, unfortunately even more ill-considered questions often follow.
exercise
Example scenario:
A cashier in a supermarket in London tells a customer who is woman wearing a hijab: “You speak really good English.”
Debriefing
As you may experience with this exercise, there are different perspectives and thoughts of both the cashier and the customer. While the intention behind the comment may have been innocent, the effect it has on the customer may be negative, making them feel singled out or stereotyped. In the introduction we already mentioned that discrimination also works without bad intent, that’s why we are talking about the intention and effect of actions. With this exercise we can show that:
Discrimination can occur even without malicious intent and we like to emphasize the need to focus on the impact experienced by the person being discriminated against. It is usually not our goal to hurt, embarrass or offend anyone. Nevertheless, it happens often enough that the mood suddenly changes in a conversation or interaction. It’s about being aware that some people have to endure the same situations over and over again. Often we are not aware that behind many of our actions, there is a system that we often do not recognize or ignore. The fact that we do not recognize or ignore the structural, systemic aspect behind it is due to our individual privileges. Even if it’s the first time I’m asking someone something (Where are you from? Why are you in a wheelchair? Are you a girl or a boy?), it may be that the person hears this question every day from different persons and is very annoyed by it. It should also be noted that these listed questions make the opposite one ‘of the others’ (-> Othering). Apparently, the person does not fit into my thoughts of ‘standard’, so I ask them where they are from, what gender they are, or that I think I have to tell them that they know the official language of the country well, etc. Apart from the fact that these are all very intimate questions about an identity, these questions have little to do with interest. Often these questions have more to do with satisfying one’s own curiosity. Therefore, we would like to encourage a change of perspective. The following questions may be helpful: What kind of situation is the person in? Why do I want an answer to this very question? What does the answer mean for me and what does it mean for the person? We want to underscore that the effect of discrimination is what matters most, as it can have lasting emotional, psychological, and social consequences on individuals. To further clarify the position ‘intention does not equal effect’, some hurtful and discriminatory statements and questions are listed below. Often, people who observe such situations find it “exaggerated” when a discriminated person defends themself because it was “not meant that way”. Maybe it is difficult for people who do not experience this discrimination to understand but some of them are just as hurtful as targeted insults. In addition, there is often a struggle for recognition of the disparagement and a compulsion to justify it on the part of the injured person. The situations are from the Respect Guide by i-Päd (Initiative of intersectional pedagogy). You will be able to read answers from people who have experienced this discrimination. We invite and encourage you to think about the following questions while reading the statements: How would I have reacted to this statement/question? Have I ever asked a person these questions? What can I possibly do in the future to support a person who is being discriminated against?